Mind & Body Connection

  Mind Body Connection

Anyone who doesn't get the connection is going to have a problem. First and formost I have to say you look better than you think you do.  No joke.  We are all so hard on ourselves. 

  I read an article once; I cut it out and kept it because it made a huge impact me.  If I could find it I would post credit to the author and quote it, but I can't.  It was an interview with several men who said that woman with perfect bodies, (who are they, right?) are far and few between even a supposed ten is really an eight and a half if you really look close.  But they said that they became bored with woman who were to obsessed with thier body image to focus n the experience.  The hot ones were all posey and the sixes were sheet huggers.  What they really loved were woman who were comfortable confident and were focused on being presnet and connected both to them and the experience.  Confidence is by far the sexiest attribrute a woman can possess.

  All of them said that a woman who was extremely comfortable in her own skin was by far the hottest.  I don't think that you should jump on the couch with a box of twinkies and a milkshake, that may be getting a little to comfortable, but we do have to lighten up.  No more obsessing and chasing the all to alusive perfection.  I think comfort with your body image is just more honest you and for anyone your with.  

  If you are doing your best,  getting enough rest, watching the alcohol intake, exercising and following a healthy eating plan annnnd....... practicing gratitude for every part of your body everyday then your job is done! There will always be someone who would rather have your body than their own.  Remember to be greatful.  Be thankful and find a way to be comfortable.   More on meditaion and diet later...gratitude and comfort first. 

elle     

Your Mouth

Next Subject;
  Your Mouth.....

  Close it! Here's why; because it's true you know..."I'm made of rubber your made of glue, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you!"
  Not in the literal sense of course.  But when you verbally massacre someone it puts you on a frequency of negativity, anger and dislike.  Your dislike of them invites others to dislike you, it happens cosmically. Realize that your audience, who may seem captivated, are all thinking the same thing "what's that witch saying about me?"  I've struggled with this.  I have been guilty of this.  To this day I have a difficult time turning a deaf year to it but I'm working on it.  I have made a lot of progress. I am a stylist and know how damaging chair talk can be.  I abstain 99% of the time.  If I say anything it's mild and not something that I would be ashamed of if it was repeated.  If I slip in my private life I have a rule that whatever I said, I must repeat to the person I said it about.
  Man up, ladies!  Say it if you mean it.  On another note there is a difference from expressing an opinion; eg; "I just don't enjoy the things she does, we haven't got a lot in common.  She's just not my cup of tea." Or launching a full on character assignation that leaves the listener almost feeling the subjects blood and guts all over them!  Don't say anyone has a fat ass or flappy bat wing arms and worst of all, chin hair, that's really low!  I'd also like you to please comment on this and remember life is hard enough without people tearing you apart when you're not there to defend your self.  I am thankful that I see this for what it is..a pimple on the ass of your personality.  I will very hard to eliminate this from mine....Say what you mean, mean what you say, but don't say it mean....

Elle

Meditation Day Two

Meditation: Day Two 

 
  Well today went surprisingly well did I constantly fight the word garbage that clogs my head of course I did!  At one point I tried so hard to control my thoughts that my brain rebelled to the point of being Turret Syndrome like, with random, vulgar, nonsense thoughts.  I thought I lost control of my brain to a four year old....(tee-hee) poking me every time I tried to settle it.  But at last there was quiet!  I felt that floating sensation that surrounds you just before sleep comes.  It was nice and made me want more.  More peace, more calm, more nothing! Iit didn't last long before the thought vomit returned but I can clearly see that with a lot of practice it could be a beautiful thing!  I am thankful for a glimpse at self imposed peace.  Why is it so easy to put ourselves in a state of chaos but such a task to find peace??

Meditation....Hmmmm

Meditation ... hmmmm

  I am completely on board with the concept of gratitude and positive thinking.  I have learned that dealing with any situation from a place of love is another way to do life better.    But I also believe that we need to know ourselves, we can't be renters in our own bodies.  We need to be in touch and connected living honestly not with dilutions. I believe meditation is one of getting there.  

  But this is where I struggle because it involves quieting my mind...oh boy, no easy feat!  I have said many times it's like an episode of hoarders in there.  I am determined to get to a quiet and clear place. 

  Today I tried to meditate.  I know success doesn't come right away soooo baby steps are ok.  First I try to find a quiet time in my home.  Then 5 a.m. it is!   I decided to try laying down and letting the weight of my body go, let the mat take my weight.  Next I focus on nice images, ocean, palm tree, a huge closet with thousands of flip flops and great bags!  Ok, back to the palm tree because the bags lead to to many other distracting thoughts. Just the palm tree now with a hint of a breeze.  Add a sunset behind and some white sand.  A silhouette of a bird in flight in the distance, and then it happens....."we need eggs."  The palm tree is gone so is the sunset and it took the bird and I'm trying remember where I put the dry cleaning slip and I am suddenly worried that I have an item ending on ebay, ugh!  It was a quick decent into a shopping list, a growling stomach and visions of k-cups, news and email.  But the good news is, I felt good. It was a start and I will not give up.  Tomorrow I will try again, maybe even later today.  I will find a quiet place in my head! I am important and my mental and physical state are very important.  I can't be there for anybody if I can't be there for myself! I am thankful for any peace I find no matter how brief, no matter how small.


elle      

Believe It's Possible

Believe.....You can say whatever you want but it's what you believe that counts.  That's why placebos work and why delusion festers in many of us like a like an unclean sore.  It's why addiction is rampart.  It's why we stay in relationships that just don't work.  So the bad beliefs we hold are super successful and so we  get stuck in ruts that really are not to deep to climb out.  If we would only believe we could.  Sooo why are the good beliefs and the ones that make us strong and successful so elusive?  They are out there, I know there are people with huge odds stacked against them that can persevere.  If you realize that there are literally millions of events happening simultaneously in this world that could impact you in as many ways without a moments notice you have to see that anything is possible....anything. It is said that the definition of insanity is continuing to do the same thing and expect a different outcome.  You have to change the way you think to change the way you feel so that your beliefs and feeling are on the same plain. So believe. Believe hard. Believe with feeling.... But most importantly believe with conviction and absolute joy!

elle

  

Are You Paying Attenion?

  

  Focus...sooo important. Sooo powerful. Giving a great amount of attention to something is like giving someone a key to your house.  Total access into your life.  Meaning that for good or bad anything you make very important and give large amounts of attention to will dominate direction and events in your life.    If you over focus on your children, let's say...and you should, but if you hyper focus on them and their needs and activities and moods and drama what happens?  You lose yourself.  It's the same thing with your husband or a diet or exercise, QVC or an addiction.  Be careful about your attention and time.  Diversify, and make sure you give time for gratitude.  Gratitude is the great multiplier of the things you love not obsession.

   Take time to meditate.  Spend time focusing on the little lift...the happy attack you feel after a quiet session spent in gratitude.  Let that joy create feelings of peace and happiness, wallow in it.  If you are having a problem with someone or something don't focus on the disturbance.  Instead focus on everything and anything that is good about the person or situtation.  Imagine a solution or several possible good outcomes and give that your eye.

  Someone once told me that Mother Theresa had been asked to attend a war protest rally that was expecting to attract thousands and she declined to the the surprise of the organizers.  She told them that even in protest the focus was still war and she did not want to particiapate in anything that would possibly empower the very thing they were rallying against.  She told them if they ever decided to hold a peace rally attracting thousands in the name of love that she would be there.....
  I am thankful to know that there are people that evolved and that enlightened.  Another motivation to to life better. 

Elle

Windy Days Do Not Have To Be Bad Days

    Windy days do not have to be bad days......

  Dont be blown by every wind.  Meaning, you can choose what you get upset about, yes you can, don't say no!  You can decide to be ok with something, you may have to think about it differently to drop kick it off the list of things you feel obligated to be mad about.  Now I am not suggesting that if someone is beating you or cheating on you that it's your fault because you haven't chosen to be alright with it.  Nooooo, not at all.  There are lines in the sand and don't use this post to move it to an uncomfortable place, ok???
  I'm saying that if there are so many triggers in your life that you feel you are angry all the time then something has to be done, knock it off no one likes a bitch and if you are lonely it will make you crankier.
  Step one; think of every single thing you can to be thankful for...even if it's just a pedicure you didn't smudge on the way to the car.
  Step two; figure out what you are really angry about.  Most of the time our anger is displaced. It's about something else entirely, get honest and admit what it is. 
  Step Three; choose, that's right just choose to find the thought process you need to make this ok; to take it off the trigger list. 
  I mean some of this happens naturally, if you think about it. Most of us mellow at least a little, as we age. Our perspective shifts and with it our thinking process; as it relates to that issue, does as well. Otherwise we would remain teenagers emotionally for the rest of our lives.  You don't have to be angry al the time.  You can take control and make it cease to be an issue that robs you of your joy!  You cannot be upset if you do not allow it.  If it doesn't compromise your morals, beliefs or safety get over it!
Let. It. Go.

elle